Days 16 & 17

The past couple days I've been thinking a lot about what lead up to my weight gain over the past year/year and a half.  I don't know how many times these past several months I have prayed asking God for self-control over my eating habits.  Countless times.  I had seemed to gain this fruit in many other areas in my life, but until recently never really dealt with it when it came to food.  I've always had a pretty high metabolism.  I went through a "chunky" time in like 8th-10th grade.  Then lost a ton of weight in 11th and 12th.  Then leveled out at the beginning of college.  And I stayed there.  For several years.  Then I had triplets.  And quite honestly I lost all that baby weight super fast.  I was down to 5lbs below my pre-preg weight after about 5-6mos.  It was great!  But as our children grew and started eating regular food, our doctor urged us to feed (primarily Asher) as much FAT as we could get down the kid.  You see he had lung issues, which I'm not going to get into the full story here, but his weight effected those issues so we needed to "fatten him up".  His breathing causes him to burn an extreme amount of calories, hence needing way more fat and calories in his diet.  SO, in came real bacon, as opposed to the Turkey we had been eating.  Also more cheeses, and sweets and just anything fatty we could find.  At first I would just make his food with all the extra fatty in it and not eat it.

Then I got lazy.

Then I started to like it.

Then I just ate because it sounded good and it was in the house.  Other people smoke, I ate.  That's the only thing I can think of that comes close to what I've been doing this past year.  But it's not 'cus of stress.  It's weird.  I like to eat the most when I'm happy....and I'm a generally very happy person...so.  yeah.  I figured that out during this fast.  Every-time I would get really excited about something or super happy my initial thought was "lets go out and eat with friends!!"  Then I was like, "oh yeah.  hmmm" HA  So I"m learning to be happy and not want to eat everything in site :)

20lbs later......

I believe that the Dave Ramsey principle works here.  At least it did for me.  "You have to get MAD!"  Of course he was speaking about debt for those who haven't been through Financial Peace University (go through it, it's great, and will change your financial life.....anyways)  But I don't know about you, but I was not just mad, I was ANGRY that I had let myself go.  And I'm not obese by any means, but I just didn't feel good.  I felt fat.  I felt heavy.  My jeans didn't fit.  And we all know: Jeans DON'T lie.  Slowly my clothes were fitting snugger and snugger and I was trying to find ways to not look fat. I was tired all the freaking time.  When I got up, when I was playing with my kids, when I was resting.  All I wanted to do was lay around and nap.  And I'm not a take a nap kind of person.  I was just exhausted all the time.   We really are what we eat.  Junk in = blah and tired and weight gain.  My skin was just blek...dehydrated all the time.

Before this fast, my stomach literally looked like I was 4 or 5 mos pregnant.  And I'm not.  HA!

Just through this fast thus far, God is answering my prayer.  He is TEACHING me self-discipline and control over my eating habits through me taking action and me disciplining myself and going through this.  Day by day.  It's hard.  But OH SO worth it.  I've been praying before and during this entire journey that God would literally change my way of thinking about food; change my cravings and desires.  That by the time I am done, I am craving HEALTHY more than anything.  That this not just be something I did this year, but this change the way I see food, cook food, view myself, and again....how we really are what we eat.

The past two days, that has been all I have wanted.  Healthy.  I want a salad, or a lettuce wrap, or just fresh veggies (non juiced).  I am craving all things healthy.  It's good.  I've been on Pinterest scouring for great healthy recipes.  And I've found SO many on there!  It's exciting!

Since being on this fast just a couple benefits:

• Clearer/smoother skin (I have sensitive skin and a bit of Rosesea and it's WAY better)  My husband has even told me and other people that my skin has this glow about it that he hasn't seen in a while :)
• Weight loss - 16lbs so far!
• Not fatigued - WOW, I feel great when I wake up in the mornings!  I wake up rejuvenated and ready for my day.  As opposed to how I WAS feeling....I was laying in bed and sleeping forever and even after waking up I was incredibly grawgy.  And that would just last throughout the day.  NOT any more! yay!
• Mind feels clearer - when they talk on the movie Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead about how you start to feel  like a fog is being lifted in your head....it's for reals people.  

So today is day 17 and I am SOOOOO very thankful that God has brought me down this path.  Sometimes I just wish that HE would just answer my prayer....in this case, just bestow me with self discipline and control.  But HE doesn't work that way.  And I'm glad.  I'm thankful that God allows us to make those hard decisions and just rely on Him.  Because it's these times that I cherish.  I love Him showing me that I DO have the strength, that I CAN do it, push though, overcome.  I'm learning.  A student to the end :)

Psalm 94:12 Joyful are those you discipline, LORD, those you teach with your instructions

Proverbs 12:1 To learn, you must love discipline

I am joyful!

Happy Juicing everyone!